Friday September 26, 2003: this tattoo of a ring
You know, for being on vacation, i've been awfully busy.
An outline of my week:
Saturday, I helped Chris clean his place--tackling the clutter, getting him a bit more organized, and scrubbing his place down quite a bit. On Sunday, I painted my office. Instead of being a medium green, it is now a green-tinted white, which I like much better. Chris came over to help for part of the job, which I appreciated.
Monday and Tuesday were both spent on errands. Many errands. I went to a doctor's appointment, took Lilith to the vet, and went shopping at various places. Tuesday night, I was called into work, and since then I've been at least doing email three or four times a day.
Wednesday, I did all the little things around the house that I've been meaning to get to but just haven't had the time--fixing some stuff up, painting a CD chest, putting a new quilt on the bed, and so on. My favorite part of yesterday was using my spiffy new electric mattress pad. Crawling into a bed that was pre-warmed was utter and absolute heaven. I also went and ordered a cake for the party I'm having in a bit over a week--Mexican Chocolate Cake. I had part of a slice while I was making up my mind what cake I wanted, and oh my GOD is it decadent. Amazing.
And today....well, today was my birthday. I got up and ran, came home, and cooked what passed for a decadent breakfast for me these days--scrambled eggs with cheese, canadian bacon, and sauteed mushrooms in it.
And I went clothes shopping. Birthday present to myself, you see. Happy birthday to meeeee!
I have found out something amazing. I can now shop in "normal" stores! I found what is really the most amazing dress at Target, a silk/cotton/cashmere sweater at The Limited (on sale!), and a really nice bra at Victoria's Secret. Also, I made what I anticipate will be my last purchase at Lane Bryant--a pair of jeans and some undies to replace the ones that are too big.
(I might go back and buy a sweater when they go on sale. Maybe.)
But I tried on some tops, and the smallest size they carry....hung on me. And not a drapey attractive hanging, either, more like baggy icky hanging.
(For my male/international readers, Lane Bryant is a large-size clothing store in the US. It's one of two chains that carries reasonably attractive clothing in larger sizes that's aimed at people under forty.)
And the jeans I bought were the smallest size they carry--a 14W, which corresponds to a regular 16.
I'm...amazed. You see, I sort of thought that no matter what I did, i'd always have only one store in the mall i could buy clothing from. It's actually kind of nice to know you only have to hit one store, and if you hate the season's line, you're done with clothes shopping for the quarter.
Now...I have choices. I spent a lot of time today wandering the mall, looking at different stores that I'd never paid attention to. What's the difference between The Limited and Ann Taylor, for example? (I can't fit into *anything* Ann Taylor sells, basically.) What sort of person shops at one store versus another? What age bracket/income level is each store aimed at? There is a bewildering array of choices available.
And then there are the men's stores. And places like Eddie Bauer.
I very much fear that I'm going to turn into a total clothes horse once my weight has settled. At the moment, i'm buying only pieces that are either going to at least somewhat fit when i'm 30 pounds lighter or things that I need anyway, the dress being one of the latter. But when I've figured out what my body size and shape is going to be like for the long run...watch out.
And today, my journal is six years old. Happy birthday, journal!
My birthday self-portrait:
Tomorrow, I am getting six inches of my hair cut off, having coffee with Chris, and then proofreading and editing my submissions to some local poetry magazines. I am teensy bit nervous about this. Just a tad. It's been a very long time since I really let my poems out into the world except on my Web site; it's a little daunting to think that there will be strangers reading my work who I've given permission to judge it.
But! Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
I am still keeping my fingers crossed.
And in other writing news, I am finishing a poem for the bus poetry contest and putting together another chapbook manuscript. The work continues on. I feel badly that I'm not doing as much art as i'd like, but I honestly don't have the time at the moment. I know I need to make time, just like i need to make time for yoga and for petting kittens, and for reading and writing and all the other things that sustain me.
I am now running two miles at a time. Okay, the last mile of those two I'm walking for part of, but still! I'm impressed with myself. I also have huge blisters on my heels. Ow.
From the other night:
Juniper has a very special message for me tonight.
The message is, "I love you, lots and lots. See how much I love you? I love you so much that I will let you hold me and trim out all of my mats on my butt, that's how much I love you. And when you lie down in bed, I love you then, too, even more, because I can come curl up by your head and purr and purr and purr.
"Also? I have gas."
It's past the equinox again, and I find myself repeating patterns set by years past. I've been very deliberately avoiding hanging out with people this week, getting my alone time in as the days shorten and the nights get longer and darker. I am nesting, doing all sorts of things to make sure i will be comfortable in my house through the winter and into spring.
Alone time is still one of my selfish delights. I run, and I hammer some things and use the electric screwdriver on others, wash some things and sort others. I stretch, and the life of the house wraps around me, the place where all my books live, as well as my cats. The place where I'm safe, and happy.
And I smile into the late September sunshine. And walk into a world that I, for once, belong to.
An outline of my week:
Saturday, I helped Chris clean his place--tackling the clutter, getting him a bit more organized, and scrubbing his place down quite a bit. On Sunday, I painted my office. Instead of being a medium green, it is now a green-tinted white, which I like much better. Chris came over to help for part of the job, which I appreciated.
Monday and Tuesday were both spent on errands. Many errands. I went to a doctor's appointment, took Lilith to the vet, and went shopping at various places. Tuesday night, I was called into work, and since then I've been at least doing email three or four times a day.
Wednesday, I did all the little things around the house that I've been meaning to get to but just haven't had the time--fixing some stuff up, painting a CD chest, putting a new quilt on the bed, and so on. My favorite part of yesterday was using my spiffy new electric mattress pad. Crawling into a bed that was pre-warmed was utter and absolute heaven. I also went and ordered a cake for the party I'm having in a bit over a week--Mexican Chocolate Cake. I had part of a slice while I was making up my mind what cake I wanted, and oh my GOD is it decadent. Amazing.
And today....well, today was my birthday. I got up and ran, came home, and cooked what passed for a decadent breakfast for me these days--scrambled eggs with cheese, canadian bacon, and sauteed mushrooms in it.
And I went clothes shopping. Birthday present to myself, you see. Happy birthday to meeeee!
I have found out something amazing. I can now shop in "normal" stores! I found what is really the most amazing dress at Target, a silk/cotton/cashmere sweater at The Limited (on sale!), and a really nice bra at Victoria's Secret. Also, I made what I anticipate will be my last purchase at Lane Bryant--a pair of jeans and some undies to replace the ones that are too big.
(I might go back and buy a sweater when they go on sale. Maybe.)
But I tried on some tops, and the smallest size they carry....hung on me. And not a drapey attractive hanging, either, more like baggy icky hanging.
(For my male/international readers, Lane Bryant is a large-size clothing store in the US. It's one of two chains that carries reasonably attractive clothing in larger sizes that's aimed at people under forty.)
And the jeans I bought were the smallest size they carry--a 14W, which corresponds to a regular 16.
I'm...amazed. You see, I sort of thought that no matter what I did, i'd always have only one store in the mall i could buy clothing from. It's actually kind of nice to know you only have to hit one store, and if you hate the season's line, you're done with clothes shopping for the quarter.
Now...I have choices. I spent a lot of time today wandering the mall, looking at different stores that I'd never paid attention to. What's the difference between The Limited and Ann Taylor, for example? (I can't fit into *anything* Ann Taylor sells, basically.) What sort of person shops at one store versus another? What age bracket/income level is each store aimed at? There is a bewildering array of choices available.
And then there are the men's stores. And places like Eddie Bauer.
I very much fear that I'm going to turn into a total clothes horse once my weight has settled. At the moment, i'm buying only pieces that are either going to at least somewhat fit when i'm 30 pounds lighter or things that I need anyway, the dress being one of the latter. But when I've figured out what my body size and shape is going to be like for the long run...watch out.
And today, my journal is six years old. Happy birthday, journal!
My birthday self-portrait:
Tomorrow, I am getting six inches of my hair cut off, having coffee with Chris, and then proofreading and editing my submissions to some local poetry magazines. I am teensy bit nervous about this. Just a tad. It's been a very long time since I really let my poems out into the world except on my Web site; it's a little daunting to think that there will be strangers reading my work who I've given permission to judge it.
But! Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
I am still keeping my fingers crossed.
And in other writing news, I am finishing a poem for the bus poetry contest and putting together another chapbook manuscript. The work continues on. I feel badly that I'm not doing as much art as i'd like, but I honestly don't have the time at the moment. I know I need to make time, just like i need to make time for yoga and for petting kittens, and for reading and writing and all the other things that sustain me.
I am now running two miles at a time. Okay, the last mile of those two I'm walking for part of, but still! I'm impressed with myself. I also have huge blisters on my heels. Ow.
From the other night:
Juniper has a very special message for me tonight.
The message is, "I love you, lots and lots. See how much I love you? I love you so much that I will let you hold me and trim out all of my mats on my butt, that's how much I love you. And when you lie down in bed, I love you then, too, even more, because I can come curl up by your head and purr and purr and purr.
"Also? I have gas."
It's past the equinox again, and I find myself repeating patterns set by years past. I've been very deliberately avoiding hanging out with people this week, getting my alone time in as the days shorten and the nights get longer and darker. I am nesting, doing all sorts of things to make sure i will be comfortable in my house through the winter and into spring.
Alone time is still one of my selfish delights. I run, and I hammer some things and use the electric screwdriver on others, wash some things and sort others. I stretch, and the life of the house wraps around me, the place where all my books live, as well as my cats. The place where I'm safe, and happy.
And I smile into the late September sunshine. And walk into a world that I, for once, belong to.
